Come up with an open-ended question or a closed-ended question followed by an open-ended question for the following situations.

• You are meeting someone on the first day of class.
• You are meeting someone while playing at the park.
• You are meeting someone on a tour bus on at the Grand Canyon.

Now you come up with some other situations.

If you are just meeting someone for the first time, keep the conversation light and not too personal.  Start by talking about the surroundings or event you are attending.

Use an open-ended question or a statement or closed-ended question followed by an open-ended question.

What did you think of the movie? (open-ended question)

How long have you known Pomegranate? (closed-ended question)

How did you meet? (open-ended question)

This painting is interesting. (statement)
What do you think? (open-ended question)

If the other person asks you a question, follow up with a question of your own.

Remember that meeting people and getting to know them is supposed to be fun.  If you are feeling uncomfortable with where the conversation is going or you are uncomfortable with questions that are being asked of you, it is okay to end the conversation with “I must be going now.”

Questions are a great way to get the other person talking…if you ask the right type of question.

We are going to lump questions into one of two categories…closed-ended questions and open-ended questions.

Closed-ended questions can be answered in one or two words.

Closed-ended questions typically stop the conversation, unless they are then followed by an open-ended question.

“Are you…?,”” Do you…?,” and “Have you…?” are typically closed-ended questions.

Some examples of closed-ended questions:

• What time is it?
• Have you been here before?
• Do you like this band?
• Are you going to eat that?

Open-ended questions require more than a one or two word answer.  They require an explanation. Open-ended questions keep the conversations going.

“What?,”” Why?,” or “How?” are good ways to start open-ended questions.

“Tell me about…” and “How do you feel about…” are also great ways to keep the conversation going.

Some examples of open-ended question:

• What is in this fabulous dip?
• How did you like Florence?
• What did you do there?
• Why do you like pie?

It is okay to start with a closed-ended question to get some information.

But follow it up with an open-ended question to keep the conversation going.

You need information about the other person.  Who are they?  Who do they know?  Why are they here?

Adding a bit of information about yourself while introducing yourself is a great way to get information about another person.  When you offer information, the other person will probably offer the same information back.

“Hello.  I’m Peaches, and I am Pit’s sister.” may get “Hi. I’m Mango.  I’m Pit’s chemistry lab partner.”

“Hi, I’m  Persimmon Smith.  I just moved to town.” may get “I’m Star Brown.  I’ve lived here all of my life.  Let me know if you have any questions about the area.”

If they don’t offer the same information back, you can ask…”And you?”

This way you have a little bit of information to start the conversation.

You started with “Hi” or “Hello.”  You could even go with “Good morning,” or “Nice to meet you.”

You get bonus points for remembering the other person’s name, so let’s talk about some techniques for remembering his or her name.

• Try to say his or her name right away while looking at them, e.g. “Hello Pit, it is nice to meet you.” or “Pit, have you met my friend, Gladys.” or “Good-bye Pit, we must talk again soon.”
• Repeat the person’s name in your mind three times.  If you can, write it down three times.
• If you know someone else who has the same name, create a picture of them standing together in your mind, e.g. have your crazy Uncle Joe with his arm around your new acquaintance Joe.
• You could also create any sort of picture in your mind that will remind you of the name, e.g. if you meet someone named Thomas, you could picture his face on Thomas the Tank Engine.
• See if there is a rhyme that you can make up about the person that includes his or her name, e.g. if you meet hyperactive Will, you could remember “Will needs to chill.”   Be nice about it, though!