When our needs are met, we are pretty happy campers.  We feel joy, peace, and contentment.

But when our needs are not met, we will probably be feeling more negative emotions like anger, sadness, or irritability.

If we are tired we are missing out on our need for sleep and may feel grumpy.  If we are hungry, we don’t have our need for food met and may feel grouchy.  If we weren’t invited to a party, our need for belonging is not being met and we may be feeling sadness.

Our feelings are our internal “needs met” gauge.  Feelings are not good or bad, though they may feel that way.  They are just a way to let us know when our needs are being met (positive emotions) and when they are not being met (negative emotions).

If we can identify our needs we will have a better chance of meeting them.

The next time you feel a strong emotion, stop for a moment and see if you can identify what need is not being met.  Even if the situation remains the same, you may be able to find another way to meet that need.

For example, Peaches was not invited to Star’s party.  She felt hurt and sad.  The need that was not being met was the need to belong.  To help her fulfill that need, she asked another friend, Persimmon, to have a sleepover.

While Peaches still wished that she had been invited to the party, her need to belong had been met and she didn’t feel the strong negative emotions anymore.

Tomorrow we will practice matching the emotion and the need that is being met or not met.